Who is your favorite tv cook, chef, tv food personality?

I started another book today. Hearing God by Dallas Willard. Here are a few quotes.
“But one who inquires seriously about God’s guidance must never forget that even if one was to do all the particular things God wants and explicitly commands us to do, one might still not be the person God would have one be. . .An obsession merely with doing all God commands may be the very thing that rules out being the kind of person that he calls us to be.”
“God’s visits to Adam and Eve in the Garden, Enoch’s walks with God and the face to face conversations between Moses and Jehovah are all commonly regarded as highly exceptional moments in the religious history of humankind. Aside from their obviously unique historical role, however, they are not meant to be exceptional at all. Rather they are examples of the normal human life God intended for us: God’s indwelling his people through personal presence and fellowship. Given who we are by basic nature, we live–really live–only through God’s regular speaking in our souls and thus ‘by every word that comes from the mouth of God.’”

here are a few pics from the new apt....Yes i leave alot to be desired in the decorating department :)

Is it Time

Why, since I've been here, has my inspiration to write anything seemed to have vacated? I closed up tight like a clam shell, protecting something not exactly that of pearlistic qualities. To the right person, though, I guess it could be worth lots. It was such a big change, and I can't quite remember what pushed me over the edge to make the decision. Is that bad, that looking back, I don't have a good reason? I guess it was that blood, you know... that blood that runs thick through us cause we're all from the same.The same something, I don't know what. I do love them, my blood. It has been nice to be within a go-go gadgets arm's length away yet be able to breathe. But what is this air I'm breathing? Almost stagnant, here in this room day in and out, stagnant air. I'm not really sure if I lie to myself. It almost seems like if I question though, that I must, right? I'm beginning to wonder if my way of dealing with things is not actually very positive. Ignoring things seems to have worked up until this point. Not everything of course, I've tried to work through the other problems that have arisen. But those weren't those whole relationshipish issues. The ones you are meant to deal with by yourself, no, they weren't those. So maybe when I have to deal with things alone I just sometimes don't. I thought it worked fairly well, considering I haven't had to do it much. But now I think I'm lying to myself a bit. I'm not unhappy, I'm not sad... just not settled maybe. It is a crazy feeling when it doesn't seem like you have a place that you just fit. I'd just like to fit, you know? It's time to grow up and I'm scared. Every time I feel sure of something it seems to be ripped from my grasp. Maybe not even ripped, slowly pulled so that I know it is happening and I can't do anything about it. That's probably the worst. Or maybe it's the best. I just don't know. I feel like I don't have answers to anything anymore. Really, I just need to bleed. I'm sure that is part of the reason for this rant or whatever it may be, although not entirely the reason. I dreamed I was back at my middle school in line for lunch. And I told the woman my name, and she asked again... and I told her, and then she asked again so I spelled it for her. She then got a look on my face and I remember knowing something was wrong. She told me my mother died. I freaked out, screaming and crying. I remember the feeling of it all. I woke myself up at 10am shaking because of it. Maybe I just started the day off wrong? Isn't it time to grow up yet?

A trip back "home?"

The other day I took a trip, not a far trip, about 5 hours round trip. I left where I live now back to where I grew up. It was a weird trip to be honest with you. So many different sensations hit me at once. Number one, I didn't recognize a damn thing, number two, this place isn't as big as I remember it being. Lastly, the one that got me the most, things keep growing around you, even when you seem to be at a stand still.

It was so weird to drive down town 327, down the main street where as a kid I roamed with my friends. To see how many things that had changed, how some things were still the same. Cedars the café , where my ex and I sat for hours on end, talking and trying to salvage a love that was already gone. The additions, Mcdonalds, Walgreens, it is no longer a 2 light town.

The town has grown, and doubled in size, unfortunately I have grown too. I have grown out of that small town. I have gotten older and wiser, and yes I hate to admit, physically bigger just as that town has. While we sat in the Mcdonalds I looked around and wondered if I know some of the people that were sitting near us. If time and age had changed us so much that we no longer recognize one another. I looked at some of the younger kids that were either working or also eating, wondering if there parents were my old pals that I use to hang out with. Is it possible for people to grow and change so much that you might not recognize them, even though you grew up with them, hung out with them everyday and most of the weekends. It was a very weird experience, I can say that much.

One thing that I have found out about myself, is that I have to go back and see things from my past to realize that it's no longer what it was. A few months back I saw someone for the first time in 10 years. She wasn't the same person, although age had been good to her, she wasn't the 21 year old that I fell in love with. She was a completely different person. Believe it or not, seeing that made me finally get over some emotional baggage that I had held on to for way too long. I think that going back to my old hometown was the same way. I know longer miss that place, it's no longer the same, everything has changed. The people that I knew, the streets have changed, and I definitely could get lost if I was to roam.

Going back to see a town that has moved on with out me, has now made me move on with my life.

Randy Pausch, the professor at Carnegie Mellon University who inspired countless students in the classroom and others worldwide through his highly acclaimed last lecture, has died of complications from pancreatic cancer. He was 47.
Also a Carnegie Mellon alumnus, Pausch co-founded the Entertainment Technology Center and led researchers who created Alice, a revolutionary way to teach computer programming. He was widely respected in academic circles for a unique interdisciplinary approach, bringing together artists, dramatists and designers to break new ground by working in collaboration with computer scientists.
Outside the classroom, he gained public fame for delivering what would come to be known as "The Last Lecture." On Sept. 18, 2007, only a month after doctors told him that he had three-to-six months to live following a recurrence of pancreatic cancer, he presented a lecture called "Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams" to a packed auditorium at Carnegie Mellon.The moving and often humorous talk recounted his efforts to achieve such childhood dreams as becoming a professional football player, experiencing zero gravity and developing Disney World attractions. In the process, he shared his insights on finding the good in other people, working hard to overcome obstacles and living generously."If you lead your life the right way, the karma will take care of itself," Pausch said. "The dreams will come to you."The video appeared on countless websites and has been viewed by millions. Appearances on the Oprah Winfrey Show, ABC's Good Morning America and the CBS Evening News followed.A book version, "The Last Lecture" co-written by Jeff Zaslow of the Wall Street Journal (and a fellow Carnegie Mellon alumnus), became a best-seller upon its release this spring."Randy had an enormous and lasting impact on Carnegie Mellon," said Carnegie Mellon President Jared L. Cohon. "A brilliant researcher and gifted teacher, he was a key member of our Human-Computer Interaction Institute and co-founder of the Entertainment Technology Center. His love of teaching, his sense of fun and his brilliance came together in the Alice project, which teaches students computer programming while enabling them to do something fun — making animated movies and games. Carnegie Mellon — and the world — are better places for having had Randy Pausch in them."Pausch was also a pioneer in the development of virtual reality, including creating the popular Building Virtual Worlds class.A memorial service at Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh is being planned; details will be announced at a later date.He is survived by his wife, Jai, and three children: Chloe, Dylan and Logan. The family requests that donations on his behalf be directed to the Pancreatic Cancer Action Network, 2141 Rosecrans Ave., Suite 7000, El Segundo, CA 90245, or to Carnegie Mellon's Randy Pausch Memorial Fund, which the university will use primarily to support continued work on the Alice project.

I have a new Obsession!!!!
Well not sure exzactly how new it is....Ready? BBC America.
Now you may ask Dale, why are you obsessed with the paticular channel of all the 425 channels that cable televison allows. I really have no answer to this.
And this isnt even a new obsession really...Ive been hooked since Jan of 07. I love the line-up of shows! How clean is your house with Kim Woodburn & Aggi Mckenzie. These 2 old broads crack me up. The premise of this show is they seek out the filthiest....and i mean FILTHIEST houses and flats in the Uk and give the house a totally mollywash....haha!....aka good tidy up!. Im obsessed with the British dialect. I learn so much british slang everyday! I cringe all the time when i see these houses before...sometimes they cant even get through the door...haha!.
Then there is "You are what you eat". Can i just say how much i love to hate Gillian McKeith, the Health guru, Dr, demon. Shes a no-nonsence drill instructor of a dietician and is all of 5 ft. Kinda mindgety lookin if you ask me. She's so mean to the overweight people that participate on this show, which is why i watch i suppose. I dont think shes really that mean in life, but for this show, she's a bobbydazzler. The other 2 shows are "Bargain Hunt" and "Cash in the Attic" which they have marathons of on weekends, and i tell you that i get very little accomplished when its on. I wish American Tv programs were like this. I even have my sister addicted to it now, she didnt even know she got BBC America on her tv...so funny! I know Im a weirdo.....but cmon.
I havent been online alot lately, basically to just check email. When i have free time i just wanna sleep or do things around the house. I stay completely exausted. And sunday night Big Brother is back..... and you know how i get with Big Brother....haha!

Relationships!

Let's talk about this thing called "Relationships". From the words of a wise man "Why can't we all just get along?" A group of us were talking about this very issue this morning. If we could get to the point of walking in Jesus' footsteps on a daily basis think how much further we would be in our own personal faith but think of where we would be as a; I hate to use the term Religion but as a body of believers in Christ. When we go throughout our day not showing the true Christ through our walk who is getting the glory? You are. Here is the kicker with this or the problem I have with this, we as believers are faithful to those who stroke us and tell us how we are appreciated and like recognition for the "works" that we have done or are doing. Again I say who is getting the glory for that? Not God! We are to be living our lives and in everything we do it is to be giving Him the glory. I have heard growing up that God is a jealous God. As I have gotten older I understand what that means. It's not a bad thing, after all he created us. Why can't we give him credit for our life as we go throughout our day? I can tell you this is something that God has been dealing with me on lately. someone laughed at me the other day, a problem came up and it was something that I wanted God to know that I was concerned about and I said "Look Buddy, I need you to help me through this and only you can do it". I am learning to just talk to God. Throughout the day I have learned and I am still learning to just talk to God. You may call your spouse, family, or a friend throughout the day just to talk. We should be able to do the same thing with God and honestly I feel that is all He is wanting from us. He created us to worship Him and seek Him and through this time in my life I am learning to do just that. It was hard to do at first, to just say to myself, instead of saying something under my breath that I shouldn't be saying anyway and I have made a conscious effort to take that and talk to God about it. What I noticed has been such an uplifting experience. It has helped me to deal with the issues as they come up. I have been praying for wisdom daily, and feel that God has been doing just that. I have tried to have an open relationship with my God. I have included Him into areas of my life that I know He has been just waiting for me to invite Him to be a part of.
Now, let's take that to the next step with the relationships of our friend and families. Are you perfect? Then why do we expect our relationship to be perfect with our friends and our families. Someone is going to make you mad. Someone is going to upset you or do something a way that you don't like. You know what? That's OK! Forgive, because let me tell you something you are going to do something to them to hurt them the same way. Maybe on purpose maybe not but how can we live our lives so wrapped up waiting for the next thing to bother or upset us. Let me tell you something else. That is a distraction from you keeping your eyes on God. Let me clear this up I am preaching to myself the whole time I am saying this stuff. Moving on… Here is the key to all of this, are you ready? It is called communication. Open communication. And sometimes just like with God you need to be ready to hear something that is going to hurt your feelings. No pain, no gain right? Personally I try to make people happy. I don't like knowing that I have hurt someone but I know that it going to happen. I had a conversation with someone once. They were hurt by a church and they were ready to leave the church. I told them that they needed to talk to that person involved with that church to see what they might have meant by what was done or said. My friend said but I don't want to be a part of something that is like this. This is not the way church is supposed to be. I asked my friend, what happens when they have a misunderstanding with their spouse? Are you ready to just give up on them walk away from the time and effort that you have put into that relationship? Of course not! You have made a commitment to that person and you talk to them about the issue to get it resolved. The issue comes back to the three "C's".
1. Commitment
2. Communication
3. Care
So I said, why would we be ready to just give up and walk away from the commitment you have made to God in serving this particular body? Sometimes we need to be reminded of that when it comes to serving our church or our job, that we have made a commitment to be there. If we don't give it our all then we are letting God be seen in a light that He might not be proud of. Remember it's not just your name that you represent, it is God's! That has to be one of the toughest things to remember. We may be the only Christ that a person might see.
I think with these 3 things you should be able to have a "realationship". So let's recap for a minute. If you have open communication, if you have made a commitment, and if you continue to care for this relationship it will grow. Family, friend, or God all different areas of our relationships it can work.

Ganja Queen

Bali, Indonesia. Schapelle Corby, a 27-year-old Australian woman, languishes in Kerobokan Prison for a crime she insists she didn't commit. Shapelle had flown to Bali in October 2004 to join her sister Mercedes (married to a Bali man) for a two week vacation at the beach. Among her luggage was an unlocked boogie-board bag.

When she arrived in Bali and was asked by customs officials to open the tote, she discovered a ten-pound bag of cannabis flattened next to the board. Though she says she knew nothing about the marijuana, Shapelle was immediately arrested, never imagining the firestorm that would ensue. GANJA QUEEN explores the origins and outcome of this sensational case through in- prison interviews with Schapelle Corby, footage and interviews of her family (mother Rosleigh, father Michael, sister Mercedes, brother-in-law Wayan, and half-brother James) both in Bali and at home in Australia, flashback footage of Shapelle's arrest, and footage taken in and outside the courtroom during Schapelle's incendiary trial. As the sympathetic heroine at the center of the cauldron, Schapelle faces an unknown and unforgiving judicial process that could, potentially, have her executed (by firing squad) if found guilty. For Shapelle and the Corby family, the stakes could not be higher.

For the media, in both Bali and Australia, the story could not be more compelling. Schapelle's comings and goings from her prison cell to a variety of meetings and interrogations make front-page headlines for months, with the public jostling nearly every day for a peek at Schapelle as she is hustled by authorities through a gauntlet of reporters and protesters (both pro and con). In addition to chronicling the public and behind-the-scenes maneuvering by Corby, her family and legal team in the days, weeks and months leading up to her trial, the documentary explores numerous explanations for the appearance of the drugs in Corby's bag. Did this seemingly average young woman actually commit the crime for which she is accused? Did one of her family members put the marijuana in her bag without (or with) her knowing? Was there a connection to the Australian neighbor who grew pot on his property? Or was Schapelle simply the unlucky victim of a domestic drug-running operation? Indeed, with regard to the latter hypothesis, several intriguing developments arise during Schapelle's incarceration. In one report, we learn that Corby's flight occurred on the same day as a large shipment of cocaine was shipped out of the airport by a drug ring involving corrupt baggage handlers.

In another, an Australian prisoner named John Patrick Ford comes forward to testify that he overheard a conversation in prison between two men in which they discussed planting the marijuana in Corby's boogie-board bag. Both pieces of news raise hopes for Schapelle's acquittal, as do reports that the marijuana bag had not been fingerprinted, and that baggage-handling security cameras in Sydney had not been working the day of her trip. One thing is certain: The evidence against Corby is sketchy, and most likely wouldn't rise to the level of "guilt beyond a reasonable doubt" required in U.S. or Australian courts. Explaining why she might put a huge amount of marijuana in an unlocked bag, Corby scornfully asks, "Do you think somebody can be that stupid?" Among Shapelle's most ardent advocates is Ron Bakir, an entrepreneur known to TV viewers for a series of outrageous commercials selling cell phones. Explaining that a nerve was struck when he saw an emotional Schapelle for the first time on TV, Bakir becomes one of her most vocal supporters, and pumps his own money into her defense. However, Bakir ends up crossing the line when (without consulting with her attorneys) he accuses the prosecution team of seeking a bribe to reduce the requested sentence - an unfounded allegation that might cost her the court's sympathy, as well as a more lenient penalty.

Ultimately, Shapelle's fate boils down to the opinion of a triumvirate of judges. Following an explosive trial, delayed when Schapelle collapses at one point in the courtroom, the verdict is finally carried live on television both locally and in Australia. Following the shocking sentence (not to be divulged in this summary), the Court orders the evidence - both the boogie-board bag and the marijuana - burned on a pyre. As a gaggle of police officers smile in the background, we see smoke rising up into the clear Bali sky. CREDITS: Written, Produced and Directed by: Janine Hosking; Producer: Robin Eastwood; Editors: Janine Hosking and Stephen Hopes; Consulting Editor: Geof Bartz; Director of Photography: Ian Pugsley, A.C.S.; Music: Matt Walker. For HBO Documentary Films: Supervising Producer: Sara Bernstein; Executive Producer: Sheila Nevins.

Who said I couldnt cook!....Look at that steak right there buddy!!!! Thats what you call a man's Meal!

We always hear " the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 1. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, football, fishing, hunting or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Paranormal State on A&E

Has anyone seen the new show on A&E called Paranormal State? At first, I was like OK a new show to watch, helping to create awareness in the field. Then after even the first episode, I was greatly disappointed. I can't decide which is worse, Paranormal State or Most Haunted?We have their fearless leader, who would make a hot lesbian, that appears to have watched too many episodes of the old Star Trek, perhaps an illegitimate grandson of Captain Kirk himself? Captains log.... errr... sorry, actually I think he says something like Investigators log, but you get the idea.

The show is started by stating that the cases are real and from almost the beginning that just doesn't seem to be the case. They are over-dramatized and typically include a child somewhere in the show. Are we trying to appeal to people's hearts going out to helping the child? Trying to make it more dramatic? The kid picks out a photo of some guy that died and this is supposed to be conclusive? The fact that the family is so open to discussing the experiences on camera and in front of the child makes me wonder if perhaps much of what he has "seen" is stuff that (A.) He created the experience to "fit" in and get attention from the family OR (B.) It has been talked about so much and no doubt discussed prior to the show in casual conversation, perhaps has heard others talk about the kid that killed himself, maybe saw a photo in an old yearbook, that he actually has created the experiences in his own mind. OR (C.) It's possible that something is going on there, but is being blown wayyyy out of proportion.

There are no reveals of the evidence collected, everything seems to be based on what is decidedly paranormal from personal experiences. This is not an investigation, while personal experiences are important, this does not constitute as evidence. Their "psychic" who looks very much like one of the iguanas in The Littlest Petshop collection. This guy comes out with a name of a demon that is hunting the fearless leader, that seems to be going from investigation to investigation wreaking havoc for the show. They end up doing a cleansing in a trailer that was allowing the demon to remain at because it was messy inside... maybe that's why monster always live in the closet, I haven't seen many kids closets that were very well organized. Getting back to the point... they do a cleansing with supposed clergy involved praying and throwing "holy water" all over the place. For some reason, perhaps to give the feel of being hand on involved, the show's leader is the one throwing holy water around, not the clergy at all. So does that mean their leader is a priest too?But my final question for today is...... "What happens if the demon is not Catholic? Does it still abide by the rules out of professional courtesy?"I have talked with so many other REAL investigators, some that have been in this field for 20+ years and most have never come across what would be described as demonic in nature..... certainly negative, angry, frustrated, but not demonic. Not to suggest that demons don't exist, but it is not as common as this show would have people believe either. I hope this team either gets canceled or learns how to conduct a real investigation. Dont get me wrong....im still totally obsessed with this show!!!!!....:)

Long before the price of gasoline went through the roof, I loved to pack up my car and take off to the highways for a destination unknown. There’s just something special about having the open road before you and nothing to worry about but the music on your radio. Im afraid it now looks like thats impossible for most.!

CNN Headline News blasts on the tv behind me... The newscasters yammer on and on about car bombs and the war on terror. I ask to myself "When will this be over"? Will it ever be over in our lifetime? Its doubtful at best. We've heard more of the same for 7 years now! I will be so happy to vote this Novemeber!

Its Morning about 5:45am...I am still up, Yes! I just wanted to watch this new day dawn!

Keats once said, “I scarcely remember counting upon happiness—I look not for it if it be not in the present hour—nothing startles me beyond the moment. The setting sun will always set me to rights, or if a sparrow come before my Window I take part in its existence and pick about the gravel.” I want to marvel in this existence of imagination. What if I could become every marginalized person in the world, in order to be transformed, to help transform all that surrounds me. :) His words amaze me!

Well....another Fathers day goes down in the books...and ive made it through, fairly well concidering, this is definately one of the toughest days of the year for me....you would think christmas or maybe a more celebrated holiday where missing family would be more thought of... But every since my dad was killed when i was 14, its a day i dread to come. But each year io must say i get a little better at dealing with it. I spend extra time praying and just talking to my dad .
At church this morning all the fathers and sons looked so dapper and i wished i could have had my dad there....or even a son.. Its times like that when i wished i wasalready married and settled with kids and the whole 9...Hopefully it will be soon!.being a bachelor isnt all its cracked up to be in reality. But i also know the lord in his own good time will let that happen soon.... i wont rush it.
My brother came over for dinner today.. we watched movies and i had a huge roast in my freezer so i just threw it in the over...without even realizing it me and my oldest brother both said at the same time..."it smells like grandmas house in here". and it really did....its so funny how smells take you back to your youth after sooo many years have passed us.. But i think we all enjoyed spending the day together..we talked a little bit about dad...but didnt dwell on it..
im gonna post a few pics of the meal me and my brother made.....Roast, blackeyed peas, noodles, and cornbread.... choc chunk cookies....with sweet tea...mmm..
How did everyone celebrate fathers day? did everyone have a good day? what did you do with dad? or if dad is no longer with you, what is your favorite memory of dad?

Slacker Blogger

Maybe that's what I should rename this blog? Obviously, I have been slack in posting anything more than book reviews in the last couple of weeks.

I realized today when I was reading other peoples that even if the midst of everything they've been dealing with, ya'll manage to post a couple of updates, so that people don't worry too much about you, and can keep track of how wveryone's doing. It occurs to me, that by being silent, I might just be worrying some of you so here's a quick update. (alltho i only have one reader here. which is quite funny in itself )....lol

Everything's fine!
No, seriously everything is fine. For the better part of last week I had a number of half-complete thoughts I wanted to blog about, but never really seemed to get any of them to turn into complete thoughts, so I didn't. For the last week or so, things have been so crazy, insanely, hectic at work that by the time I get home, I've got time to post some thoughts, but lack the motivation or mental energy to do much more than read other blogs and watch Tv...
It's actually taken all my will to sit here and write this much without going off to look at something bright and shiny that doesn't require me to think.

So, never fear. It's not that I'm overwhelmed with life's difficulties that keeps me from blogging, it's simply a limit to the amount of mental focus I have during a given day, that is being used up at work more than usual! Eventually, things will get a bit less hectic.
At least that's what I've been telling myself. ;)

Sen. Barack Obama of Illinois sealed the Democratic presidential nomination Tuesday, a historic step toward his once-improbable goal of becoming the nation's first black president. A defeated Hillary Rodham Clinton maneuvered for the vice presidential spot on his fall ticket.

Obama's victory set up a five-month campaign with Republican Sen. John McCain of Arizona, a race between a 46-year-old opponent of the Iraq War and a 71-year-old former Vietnam prisoner of war and staunch supporter of the current U.S. military mission.
McCain was plainly eager for the race to begin, and accused his younger rival of voting "to deny funds to the soldiers who have done a brilliant and brave job" in Iraq.


In remarks prepared for delivery in New Orleans, McCain agreed with Obama that the presidential race would focus on change. "But the choice is between the right change and the wrong change, between going forward and going backward......Amen!

Farmers Market

June 2nd would have beeen my daddys 74th birthday. Yes, an old man. I wish he were here to talk to. I have come to realize in my twenty-eight years that we can't ever go back. Im sure others learn it so much faster, and are better people for it. "Not i" said the foolish boy at heart.

Im so extremely tired of feeling guilty....guilty for living, smiling, feeling any array of emotions that may pass me during the day. She was so sick, He was taken entirely too soon. She always made the decision to fight, he didnt care to. What do i do?

Its the Bullshit from the past, that fogs my vision of the future and resorts my thought to being so negative i cant cope. I wanna tell People what god Has done in my life. The chance he has given me.
In my mind im a storyteller, the one who rectifys everything, makes things once broken, whole again.. But do i really know anything, ABOUT ANYTHING? all i know is what i know!.

Its okay Mama, im not gonna let anything happen to you. or to me. Everyday we had was a miricle. doesnt get easier having said that or typed it...No, but its true nonetheless. Hugs? No, ill pass. I dont wanna feel that kind pain that comes with unconditional love...My heart cant take another break. The world is a much different place without my mother, thats for certain. Its hard to connect A to B The heartstrings of my tattered family.

Dont look back you say...how can i not?
Alot of doubt and fear in my life...consume me.
How relevent are you in my life?
A message on a voicemail is worth it.
Cant delete....too final.
Just Breathe- Easier for me.
The thing about Grace, it really heals you if you let it....How can i let it? If i dont feel sad, angry......that means happiness comes into play...How can i be happy?
First gift ever given to me
...........Life.............
Symbolic i find myself not wanting to look ahead...
Just live.....its all i can do at the moment.
Day 2 day!.....Just live.

Pictures of my Hometown...They make me a little Homesick.!!

my High School..I only spend half a year here before we moved....But i loved it so.

Louvee Movie theate.....where my love of Movies and the big screen First started....I remember seeing my first movie here....Ghost dad with Bill Cosby.. I started in Night of the Living dead with my brothers, but the canibalistic effects of the movie were 2 much for me, i guess..so had to switch

The Smallest Krogers in Ohio....Possibly the united states.. My moms favorite store...she refused to switch stores when the new "Foodland" moved in to town.....That was my mama....Loyal till the end.

Family Crest

Bright Shiny Morning!!!.....Buy it!

I am not an avid Oprah fan , but in the last few years she & her show has gone from being helpful and informative (for her viewers) to just being all about Oprah. Who cares about her new hairdo? This, however, takes the cake. She is leading millions of people to down a wrong path.., plain and simple. Her true nature showed, when she said, “God’s jealous of me?” No, Oprah, it’s not about you and if you had opened your bible and read it, you would understand that. As i said..im not a big fan of her show to begin with, but my sister is and does buy her magazine.

I always knew there was something odd about her. SHE puts on to be so perfect, kind, giving and etc. She is out for herself. It really sent my blood boiling when she publicly humiliated James Frey on her program, after endorcing his amazing book, giving him all the praise in the world then, absolutely blindsiding him on national tv...thats not something i could forgive easy. I just recently ord

ered his new book on Amazon.....Let me tell you, its an amazing read. I recommend it soooo highly.

Why on earth am i ranting again Oprah Winfrey of all people you may ask.?? Well the answer can be summed up in one word...Hypocricy!

However long the night, the dawn will break.

I'm INSANELY bored right now and have nothing better to do than ramble on this here Blog..hehe... But that's what it's here for so off I go...

(Deep Breath and.....)...you had my heart, as least for the most part. I wanna go into a blog about my feelings....But i dont have the energy.

Bad manic night tonight. Bad day today, im sure it will be. its 4am and the thoughts never seem to quit. Lots of yelling from next door. Who could sleep? I want very little right now. Peace. Quiet. My own mind back. I'm just tired, but I can't sleep. If I try I'll just lay thinking. That never turns out well. Just feeling self indulgent and self-piteous right now. Tomorrows another day. I'll make it better than today. Okay, this turned out WAAAYYYY more introspective and disturbing sounding than I thought it would. lol. Im off to find my dreams, they cant run forever..:)

"WHY DAVID COOK WILL WIN AMERICAN IDOL" By Craig BermanMSNBC contributor

It would be easy to end this discussion quickly by saying David Cook will win because he's better. But instead, I'll use the balance of my time and say that Cook will win "American Idol" because Chris Daughtry didn't."Idol" is still the top-rated show in the country despite the haters' attempts to knock it off its perch, but there's no question that Daughtry's elimination started the show tilting in the wrong direction. Had he been the winner in season five, the Idol list of champions would have gone Clarkson-Studdard-Fantasia-Underwood-Daughtry, otherwise known as four successes in five seasons. Instead we got Taylor Hicks followed by Jordin Sparks, which hasn't exactly helped the show build a reputation as a star-producing factory.Good news, "Idol" fans! You may have screwed things up two years ago by picking the fun guy over the actual star in waiting, but you have a chance to rectify that this week.And you will.Because let's be honest here — the country has suffered from buyer's remorse ever since it decided to evict Daughtry early. His career has taken off, as "Idol" fans atone for their previous sins by downloading his singles and buying his albums. He even opened for Bon Jovi on tour, which is way cooler than anything this group of finalists can dream of.Cook doesn't have that same vibe, but he's close. He's never karaoke, yet he's able to work everything from Dolly Parton to Neil Diamond to Roberta Flack into his comfort zone. And he's proven to be far more adaptable at being both unique and conforming, showing that he knows how each song was meant to be sung and then putting his own spin on things.That's the trickiest skill that "Idol" judges ask the finalists to master, and most fail miserably.

Cook gives everyone enough old-school notes to convince the judges that he's taking it seriously, but throws in enough wrinkles to make the tunes contemporary. The producers couldn't have drawn up a more musically-appropriate finalist if they'd rigged one up in a machine shop.Simply put, Cook's sound is better equipped to sell music. It's got enough of a hip vibe to appear on contemporary rock stations without sounding too ridiculous, but it's friendly enough to appear on work-safe Lite Rock 101 as well.Turn on the radio Go ahead. I'll wait. Do the singers you hear sound more like Cook, with this slightly-edgy-and-yet-entirely-unthreatening style? Or do they sound like Archuleta's ... whatever.Cook also has the right personality to appeal to voters. True, he lacks the "Oh my golly! This is neato-torpedo!" charm of Archuleta, but he's no threat to mainstream sensibilities either. If he has any skeletons in his closet, they are well hidden. So are any tattoos.He's calm and polite, and comes across like someone who cares very much about winning without being a threat to break down in hysterical sobs if he loses. With his laid-back, sardonic and cynical interview style, he could be a rock star already.Not only do the show's fans want David Cook to win, the judges and the producers likely do as well.At this point the show doesn't need a young winner who's long on potential. "Idol" needs someone who succeeds immediately, so the show's producers can quit answering those nagging questions about where all the viewers have gone and get back to discussing the show as a training ground for future stars.

The judges and producers can't control who the people vote for. But they can nudge the needle, either by offering withering criticism or failing to make a big deal of a favorite's gaffes.They've wanted Archuleta in the finals all season, When he missed a lyric earlier this year, his mistake was turned into a "Ha ha, you big dope, try not to do it again" teaching lesson, as opposed to the slams that occurred when Brooke White and Jason Castro had similar screwups.Cook didn't start the season with that kind of rope, and even got into a bit of a snipe-fest with Simon early. But he quickly learned to hold his tongue, and Simon was converted into a fan. Now, at worst, Cook is the judges' co-favorite, and judging by the comments in recent weeks he's probably their preferred "Idol" champ.Kelly Clarkson, Chris Daughtry, Carrie Underwood — what do these "Idol" greats have in common? Even when they were lowly contestants forced to listen to the banter from the judges, they all sounded like people already on the radio. Put Cook in the studio, give him some good songs to work with and voila, a hit.That's what the show wants. And that will tip the balance and make Cook the seventh "American Idol.

Gosh, where do the years go?. seems like only yesterday I was babysittin these little tots.

Only a man

I've been listening to a few cd's lately- more than usualy i suppose. i've neeeded some major motivation to keep my head up. Of course i pray and give all my burdens to Jesus when i feel as tho i can handle no more on my own.
Sometimes i just need music to carry my heart, might sound funny to some, im sure. but my life has always seemed to be revolved around some sort of music, weather it be faith-based to Metal.
I've been so extremely lonely lately. I bring most of this solitation on myself. Im so stubborn, so unsure of myself. If i could wish myself away one trait i dislike about myself...im positive that would be the one.
I dont think im relationship material. I guess i never have been, Im not willing to open up the way i should. I have come to realize what some people have said about me is true Maybe i'll never find love, never get married. Maybe, just maybe my life is destined to be a solitare one.
But anyways...I digress. wasnt i talking about cd's and music? I seem to always get off track on these blogs......Maybe its the rain, who knows? Maybe its because i feel i have no security, no safe place to go....to be.

You would think at this juncture in my life i would have found some sort of solice, some sort of happiness. but i cant seem to find any. I do have happiness in my heart, by the grace of Jesus christ. but to be able to share that with someone would be a miricle at this point. I do realize it's not going to just appear before me. I know i must work towards these things and make them happen. I might sound foolish, but maybe love, a real true genuine love isnt in my cards...is beyond me, outta my reach. maybe im not capable of a real love. But i also dont wanna give up either.
My transition back into the workforce couldnt be going more smoothly. Im so blessed to have wonderful co-workers, and for that i am truly grateful

Obama 4 President...Yes We Can!

There aren't enough words to describe the respect I have for this man. his powerful, moving, and completely sincere speech proves to me that he could possibly be one of the greatest presidents we will ever have.

It appears that many of y'all are expecting some perfect person to be our next president. Wow, are you gonna be in for a big disappointment.It's impossible for me to understand how anyone could listen to Obama's entire speech and not "get" what he's trying to tell us. In our troubled world - and is there a one of you that would not agree it IS troubled? - Obama is trying to pull us all together and remind us that as different as each of us are we are tied together as Americans...each with our own shame, faults, insecurities, prejudices...but still Americans striving to reclaim some of what we've lost and move ahead.

Of course most of the anti-Obama crowd did NOT watch his entire speech or would consider reading the transcript so naturally they can't grasp the significance of his explanation in it's entirety. These same people are so used to hearing lies from our present administration they are completely incapable of recognizing honesty and sincerity from a politician. After 7-1/2 years of Bush, we now have a chance to be represented in the highest office of our country in a completely different way, with a leader that America can finally be proud of...,and that the rest of the world can finally respect instead of hate.McCain, who would be the same as Bush, will be a divider just as Bush has been. Hillary can't garner respect...she too is divisive and abrasive. Only Obama has a vision for something different, something bigger than each one of us individually. Inexperience? Look where "experience" has gotten us so far. Wisdom doesn't come from plodding along in the wrong direction for years. It's something you either have or you don't and Obama's got it.The media is certainly partially to blame for not only this latest witchhunt but all the ones that are still to come...and there WILL be more. It's a long time until November.

National media gets hold of something inflammatory and they throw it in our faces on every TV channel and every newspaper and then local media picks up the ball and keeps running. We've got a war out of control, fifteen billion dollars a month of OUR money funding it, the economy sinking like a stone and a dozen other truly serious issues...and all McCain and his supporters have to do is sit back and enjoy the ramblings of some crazy preacher spread out in every media outlet that exists.But the tide will turn...it always does. McCain will do something incredibly stupid, or maybe something simple and not that important at all that will be blown up and plastered all over the news and that will replace Obama's stupid preacher for awhile ....and the focus will once again be off what's really important in this election. But that's the American public. :( We get all riled up for fifteen minutes and then it's over until the next thing happens to be all riled up over. We're like Chicken Little..."The sky's falling! The sky's falling!" But then it doesn't and everybody but the hard core radicals move on.I wouldn't have ever said this two years ago ago, but this episode with Obama's preacher...it WILL go away. It will be forgiven and forgotten, except by those so rabid they wouldn't have forgiven Mother Teresa if she transgressed. If anything, I think he's proven himself to be even more worthy of the presidency. :)